05-26-18 – Blog Queen - Sarah Raplee

Friday, February 3, 2017

My Most Romantic ... ?

Judith Ashley is the author of The Sacred Women's Circle series, romantic fiction that honors spiritual traditions that nurture the soul.

One would think that if someone wrote romance novels, this months suggested topic “My Most Romantic …?” would be a slam dunk to write.

Perhaps not!

Scroll down to read Robin Weaver’s “The Most Romantic Potato." I smiled and even chuckled. What about your response? Did it lighten your day as much as it did mine?

However, I digress, while I may not have a plethora of romantic tales to choose from I’ve published the original seven The Sacred Women’s Circle series. Within each is an integral love story. Certainly there I waxed eloquently about at least one romantic evening.

Or maybe not.

I remember one of my critique partners when reading Lily told me that I needed a romantic evening. Dinner out at a fancy, exclusive restaurant, dancing, flowers, chocolate.

I never could write that scene.


I’ll use my own parents as an example: They celebrated their anniversary together. When their children (me included) put together a 25th and then a 50th Anniversary celebration, they bore it with grace but they were not as thrilled by it as we were. For my parents spending a quiet night at home with Dad grilling steaks and Mom baking a couple of potatoes and making a tossed green salad with homemade dressing, a glass of wine/champagne and then a dessert (usually something like strawberry shortcake with real whipped cream) was what they wanted. It was a time for them to be together, talk about their marriage, what they’d done, what they wanted to do—worries and concerns but even more important, hopes and dreams.

Early in their marriage steak would have been a luxury as would a bottle of wine much less champagne. And what’s interesting is my parents were celebrating over forty years of marriage before my mom even told me that an evening together with dad grilling steaks, etc. was their dream anniversary celebration.

What you’ll find as you follow the Genre-istas this month is that “most romantic” or even just “romantic” is relative. For some a night out on the town would be romantic. For others, a night spent at home. For others a trip to the beach. Still others would prefer a trip to the mountains.

When you read the books written by the Genre-istas, you’ll see romance and romantic scenes take place in a wide variety of settings and situations.

Sign up for Connections (my newsletter) and get a free digital copy of Lily. And for a short time you can purchase Elizabeth (book two) for $.99.

Do you know couples who have a different idea of what creates “romance” or a “romantic interlude”? Would love to hear from you. Leave comments below.

You can learn more about The Sacred Women’s Circle series on my website.

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© 2017 Judith Ashley


Michelle Somers said...

Hi Judith
I love this!
The fact that your parents, after so many years, can't think of anything better than spending quality time together for their anniversary is testament to how much they love each other, as well as loving being with each other.
That's romance.
I'm just about to celebrate my 17th anniversary and I'm the same. I hope this doesn't change after 25 years. After 50.
That's love.
Thanks for sharing the story of your parents and an indication of true romance.
Michelle xx

Linda Lovely said...

Judith--You're absolutely right. What's romantic to one couple/person can be the opposite to the other. The trouble comes when the stay-at-home person marries a out-on-the-town lover. Then romance is compromise.

Diana McCollum said...

Touching story about your parents, thank you for sharing, Judith. I think romance/romantic is in the eye of the beholder. Everyone is different and probably has a lot to do with past experiences. I'm not in to candy and flowers for celebrations, I like doing something thoughtful, going somewhere special and enjoying the moment!

Judith Ashley said...

Thank you for stopping and commenting, Michelle. I think the most important life lesson I've learned (or at least one of the most important) is that while we all may want to be loved, how that satisfactorily shows up in our lives is very different.

Judith Ashley said...

Had to smile, Linda. While I did not marry an out-on-the-town person, he was not a very expressive man. I'd been raised by parents who actually said "I love you" out loud! After meeting his parents (after we were married) I did understand him better. And years after our divorce, I truly did come to understand that the new washing machine, the new watch, the new car (for him actually) was his way of Showing me. Sigh - the words would have been enough.

Judith Ashley said...

I totally agree with you, Diana. Romance and what's romantic is in the eye of the beholder. There are so many words we use and assume everyone around us understands what we mean. The ones that really count, like 'love', truly do need to be explored in more detail. What will I see if s/he doing, saying, etc. if they love me? The answers to those questions can make a world of difference.

Sarah Raplee said...

I know a couple who go dancing for exercise and romance. Another couple go to concerts by their favorite artists.

Great post, Judith!

Michelle Somers said...

Yes, you're so right, Judith!
We all have a very different perception of what love is to us.
For me, it's the little things - the tender looks, the thoughtfulness, the gestures, that mean so much. I much more enjoy a quiet evening at home either watching our fave TV shows or playing board games with the entire family. These are the moments I cherish most.
I love that your blog has shown this too.
Michelle xx

Judith Ashley said...

Love your examples, Sarah.

Barbara Strickland said...

It's a bit like beauty, it's in the eye of the beholder.

Judith Ashley said...

Michelle, I didn't realize all the little ways my parents showed affection for each other until I married and my husband thought those things were only while dating! It was a short marriage (3 years) but I learned so much about myself and what I want in a relationship so very worthwhile.

Judith Ashley said...

Barbara, very true. Thanks for stopping by.

Michelle Somers said...

So true, Judith.
A great lesson, although a shame it ended in the end of your marriage.
That journey to self-realisation, and beyond, must be so fulfilling. And great fodder for your stories.
I always find life provides so many fabulous inspirations for my stories. The romance parts, not the murders, lol! :)
Michelle xx

Lynn Lovegreen said...

Hi Judith, so much truth in this! We all have different ideas of what romance is. One of my best friends almost forgot to get a wedding ring before the marriage ceremony, then got a couple cheap ones. When hers broke, it went on the cork board to be fixed one day, and is still there years later. But she cherishes time with her hubby--to her, that's romance, not the symbol.

Judith Ashley said...

Lynn, I love that story about your best friend. Sometimes we forget what is a symbol and what is real. The relationship is really the key.

Judith Ashley said...

Michelle, If I've learned something about myself, how to go forward with my life, how to interact in a positive way with others then no "negative" experience truly is. And yes, so many of my life experiences have been and will be fodder for my stories.