I know this is a romance blog, and my post should be about something loving and uplifting.
After all, as I compose these words, the day is beautiful, the sky blue, sun shining. This is the kind of day most people in the northern hemisphere prayed for only a few months earlier.
Now, if you have to stop and check a calendar to remember what day it is, you are not alone. After over three weeks in self isolation, my brain is running on numb.
I went into isolation on March 12. No problem, I told myself. I like being alone. Introvert that I am, I could use this as a time to finish my MIPs, I told myself. I could read, read, read! Instead, there are now moments when I'd do almost anything for five minutes in a crowd.
The truth is, in these days of Covic-19, I feel lucky I can write anything at all. In the days BEFORE, I often laughed at the talk about writer's block. That's how I am now dividing my life, Before, and After. AFTER, well, I have two manuscripts I need to be working on. Both have gone untouched for over a week. In addition, I have been attempting to read a Regency Romance novel. Self-important British nobelman falling for a saucy younger heroine. It should have been a great distraction. Unfortunatly, by chapter six I was yanwning. I know he's going to decide she is older and more mature than her years, she will take him down a few pegs and they will discover they are soulmates. I closed the book and haven't picked it up again.
SIGH! I guess not even reading an HEA is as much fun when my brain is filled with thoughts of death from daily news briefings.
Before you say stop watching the coverage, I will say that some of us need the information. I live near Chicago, and listen to the daily briefings by Chicago's mayor and Illinois' governor. Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot has almost become a celebrity, and memes like this one involving her ordering people to stay home fill the internet. She takes her meme-ability as fun.
Someone even had the brilliand idea to bake with Mayor Lightfoot, Givernor Pritzker, and Dr. Fauci. BTW, the doctor is now my ideal of a romance hero. I promise you, write a story with a MC like him and I'd be willing to get Mayor Lightfoot angry at me and brave a crowd to obtain a copy.
I'm not a baker, or even a good cook. I just know enough to know not to get upset with myself if I can't accomplish even half the things I think I should. At least now I understand why distopian novels skip over the part about how civilization sunk. What I see around me is almost too mundane to be believed. A good novel requires conflict to be interesting to readers.
For me, life too requires an element of conflict that shelter-in-place does not produce. While the life we are living in now will probably not lead to a true dystopia, we may never get back to "normal" again. Instead, this could be a Humpty Dumpty situation, leaving us with a new normal vastly different from our old one once the crisis is finally ended.
In the meantime, here is the recipe I've developed for dealing with the days, and possibly months, between me and whatever the new normal will be:
- Be kind to yourself.
- Read, if you want & whatever you want.
- Write, if you can.
- Relax and vegitate whenever you need to, without guilt.
A good story requires conflict to be intresting to the reader. Life too requires the types of element of conflict that shelter-in-place does not produce. But I do thank all the families producing songs, dances and toilet paper inspired physics projects they post on YouTube and other sites to prove that ordinary people do have talent.
And if you want to share what you are doing during these long and often draining days, let me know. I'm on the lookout for ideas.
And memes. I'm loving the memes.
5 comments:
B.A., I hear you loud and clear. I also started self-isolation on March 12, I too lose track of what day of the week as well as the date. However, I do not listen to the news every day. I get a daily summary of COVID-19 (new cases, deaths, other Stay Home, Save Lives tips) in Oregon every day and that is enough.
Our spring is delightful and at times it's hard to believe that a deadly virus can even be our reality. I do get outside every day either to walk around the block or just stand in my backyard. Everyone is so good about keeping the social distance but also waving or saying "hi" as we pass each other.
My new normal will include continuing to order food through InstaCart, staying in touch with friends I've gotten out of the habit of regular contact by Zoom video and phone calls and having a greater sense of gratitude for hugs.
You are spot-on with your list, Barbara - and your memes!
I play Words With Friends with my sister a couple times a day to help pass the time. . We keep 10-12 games going at a time. I'm also making a point of calling or viswo calling a relative or friend nearly every day. Plus I'm deep cleaning the house, little by little.
I'm lucky because my husband is here to keep me company. We do some projects together, play backgammon, do yard work, take drives (we live in the country.) I think in many ways it is easier for us because we live on an acreage. We can go outside on our property and take walks. It's always quiet here.
Thank God our collective efforts to shelter in place are flattening the curve here in Oregon. I pray the same happens all over the world. God be with you, Barbara.
We, too, measure our lives in "Before" and "After'.
Great list, Barbara! We are living ins strange times, and each of us needs to find how to get through this. I do everything you mentioned, plus go for walks and cook. (I love to bake--no stepping on the scales until this is over.) Yesterday, my husband and I took a drive just for a break.
May you keep your great sense of humor and stay well. Hang in there!
Love your list of rules! You made an interesting point about writing conflict in stories. I think it is really hard to write conflict when one's whole life feels full of unresolvable conflict right now.
I know my past normal when my life was filled with real-life conflict, I would take time and deal with it--make a plan to be executed--and that allowed me to return to writing. But now, with COVID-19, I don't have a way to resolve this conflict in my life, outside of social distancing. But I have no way to stop our leadership from making bad decisions, or to force people outside of myself to do what I believe is right, or to help scientists to find a cure or a vaccine or make testing more available.
Facing that lack of control and being able to write fictional conflict is near impossible for me. Even writing non-fiction, unless it is devoid of emotional connection, is difficult. There are days when I am able to breathe deeply and say: "Let it go just for today. Focus on something you can control." And I do, and I move forward. But at this moment I am not capable of doing that on a daily basis with my writing.
Hang in there B.A. You are not alone.
Love this post -- and you have great advice for all of us as we navigate through these times and as we prepare to eventually enter some other "new normal," whatever it may look like.
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