The prompt from this month that resonated with me the most asks us to reflect on "stuff" versus "treasures," which immediately put me in mind of the phrase "one man's trash is another man's treasure." One of my goals in my Cultivate What Matters planner this year is to declutter at least one drawer or cabinet per week (okay, that's probably too ambitious and will end up being a monthly goal!). While I have a house full of things that have long outlived their usefulness -- did I ever really need a quesadilla maker? -- I also have a hard time parting with some items that are associated with strong memories. As much as I might appreciate the minimalist and/or tiny house movements, I fear that's never going to be completely in the cards for me. Can I cut back? Absolutely. I could probably easily stand to cull my belongings by 50% or more.
Here's an example of an item most people might categorize as junk -- doubtless there are many of these lurking in dusty corners of antique stores or goodwill shops. But it hung above my grandmother's countertop bar, in my line of sight as I ate lunch or slurped on a Fudgesicle treat. It was one of her possessions that I asked to have when she died. My cousin took the harvest gold embroidered butterfly magnet that was on her refrigerator for as long as any of us could remember -- ugly (yes) but a cherished treasure all the same.
And then here's my childhood Jack-in-the-Box toy -- I definitely have memories of playing with it. Does that mean it deserves to stay? Ultimately I don't know, but for now, I'm hanging on to it.
Not only is it my own stuff/treasures that must be parsed through either. I've long been the member of the family on multiple sides most interested in genealogy. I value all the family photos that have been passed down to me for safekeeping (and indeed the originals are in a photo safe), but I also inherited boxes of sentimental items from my great-aunt who died childless, a second cousin who also died childless, the grandparents of my ex-husband. When my parents moved last year, I -- you guessed it -- took several boxes of things that they couldn't realistically store any longer but that none of us could quite bring ourselves to give away. Much of these inherited items don't hold memories for me, but I suppose ultimately it is me that will have to decide what to preserve and keep and what should be given away or thrown out.
I suppose one of the reasons I made decluttering one of my objectives this year is an increasing sense of the march of time and a desire to preserve what is truly valuable. I'd like to be able to say to my children that everything that is left are things that have meaning to me and shouldn't be tossed without thought. At the moment, there is far too much that qualifies as mere "stuff," and I want to make a concerted effort to pare down to possessions that are regularly used and/or are treasures.
Here's the milk-glass candy dish that also belonged to my grandmother and has strong memories for me. But in the absence of notes left to my kids, they would probably have no idea that it is distinguishable from other milk-glass pieces that I picked up while antiquing with their dad in the 1990s. Would they wonder about its placement on the highest shelf and pushed well away from the edge?
Yes, indeed, one man's junk is another man's treasure. Writing this blog has reinvigorated my drive to undertake small chunks of decluttering. Maybe today I'll tackle one of my cabinets! If there are things you treasure, I hope you too will reflect on ways that you might pass along that memory or the sentimental associations to those who might inherit what could easily appear to them as nothing more than disposable "stuff."
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2 comments:
A post near and dear to my heart!!! Several years ago I looked around and saw "my mother's ____________" and it struck me in a different way that while she'd died in 2002 and it was now 2017 or maybe 2018, I still looked at the item as "my mom's" So, I knew it was time to let it go. Fortunately I was able to divide her collections of amethyst glass, antique dessert plates and cups and saucers among her grands and great grands. Pieces of furniture her granddaughter was delighted to take. So now what's left may be my aunt's table or my mom's antique sideboard but that's in terms of where/how I got them. I've claimed them as "mine".
This year I plan on going through the kitchen, again, as well as my clothes closet and book shelves. I already have bare top shelves in the kitchen cabinets. Looking forward to empty bottom shelves on my book cases. I can't safely use either one so why do I have "stuff" there collecting dust...
A big project is taking out the trash compactor (it would take me all year and more to fill it up) and putting in shelving or a couple of drawers. Those I could use!
And one last thing. One of my friends has been involved in a decluttering program for a year. The goal is to get rid of a certain number of items (I think it is 12) each week. She can't always see the improvement but she told me that friends coming to her house see it is neat with No Clutter. But then she knows what's in those drawers, cabinets and closets.
I decluttered all the kitchen cabinets this weekend, and it FELT SO GOOD! I could have gotten rid of more, no doubt about that, but I did cull enough that I feel so much better about the state of the cabinets. At least 80% of what's there are items I use and would choose to move if I were leaving next week (which is my new standard: if I were moving next week, would this item go in the give away, trash or move pile).
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