07-21-18 Patricia Sargeant

Monday, January 2, 2012

Romantic Gestures

Wow, This month’s theme is romance…I write romance, but I have a fairly unromantic life. My husband is fun and I love him to death but romantic he’s not. So trying to come up with the most romantic thing that’s happened to me…is hard.

We never made it on our honeymoon to the Oregon coast because the car broke down and when we arrived home before he could work on the car, the phone rang. It was one of his customers calling with a job. We needed money for the car, so he went to work and we never honeymooned. But for many years he took me to the coast for our anniversary.

He gave me a hay baler for Christmas one year because the old one was a pain in the rear.

Another Christmas, he gave me gorgeous earring jackets but no diamond or pearl studs to put them on.
I guess I’d have to say the most romantic gesture he made was a couple of summers ago after I’d had a run-in with a rattlesnake.  The dogs and I had come across a rattlesnake while moving  a wheel line. I wanted to kill the snake but couldn’t get up my courage. I even walked back to the vehicle and grabbed a shovel to do the deed. But in the end, I talked myself out of getting close enough to kill the snake.
I told my husband about the snake. “Why didn’t you kill it?” he asked.
My come back: “What if I hadn’t killed him and just made him mad?” This garnered me the raised eyebrow look. At that moment I wondered how this marriage and this man had survived thirty years.
An hour later, my husband arrived at the cabin door with a small sunflower tucked in his shirt pocket. He pulled the bright yellow bloom out with a flourish and handed it to me with a smile that lit up his eyes. All was forgiven.
I guess it’s the little moments like that that I find romantic. How about you? What small gesture has your significant other done that pitter-patted your heart?



Sarah Raplee said...

My husband bought me a cat a few years back. I've always loved having a cat to cuddle.

But our last cat had a kitty psychotic break when we moved and bit my husband so badly he needed surgery. The resulting infection almost killed him - he was in hospital for five days and went home with an antibiotic pump.

I swore off cats. We remained pet-less for a year before adopting a fabulous German shorthair pointer.

We had been four years without a feline when my husband found a rescue cat he liked at Pet Smart. Guess what he got me for my birthday that year?

I still think it was the sweetest gesture ever.

B. A. Binns said...

For me it's always the little things. I know toomany guys who do NOTHING because they can't afford either the time or money to do something big.

On Christmas Eve eve, I grabbed a few small gifts, put them in a sack, and went around to friends and told them to reach inside and take whatever they thought felt interesting. I got some of the biggest smiles and warmes hugs from the little min-grab bag of last second gifts. Just reminded me how important the sudden spontaneous small effort can be to people.

Paty Jager said...

Sarah, that was nice of your husband.

B.A., I agree it's the spontaneous gestures that mean the most.

Anonymous said...

My husband made me pancakes this morning and meatloaf tonight.

Tammie Clarke Gibbs said...

Years ago I compiled a book called Recipes for Romance from the Leading Ladies and Gentlemen of Romance. The idea for the book came from a similar idea as your blog post. I wondered what "romance writers" really considered romantic (in their real lives) It was so much fun reading all of the responses from all the authors who participated. ( Sixty Plus authors) I still get teary-eyed when I read some of them.

Callie said...

Years ago when we were newly married and poor, I called hubby from work one day and mentioned my co-workers were all going out together for lunch, but I didn't have any money. He told me to come home for lunch. When I arrived, he had made us peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, but set the table with a tablecloth, our good glasses and dishes. Definitely one of those 'awww' moments.

Caroline Clemmons said...

Paty, you are so right that it's the small things that mean so much. My husband thinks of those every day and it reminds me of how lucky I am to be his wife. He jsut made me a lovely dinner so I'd have more time to write.

Vonnie Davis said...

Calvin is my biggest supporter. He runs the sweeper every day so I can write. He makes me a cuppachino every afternoon as a pick-me-up. when I was facing surgery, he told the doctor, "This woman is my whole life. She means more to me than anything. I want you to operate on her as if she were your mother."

Paty Jager said...

Ella if my husband could cook that would be a wonderful romantic gesture for me. You are one lucky lady.

Paty Jager said...

Tammie, that sounds like a wonderful book.

Callie, that is a wonderful romantic gesture on your husband's part!

Caroline, I wish my hubby could cook. That's a wonderful gesture.

Vonnie, your comments made me tear up!

Kathy Otten said...

I got a round bale feeder for Mother's Day once. He thought it would make it easier for me to feed my horses.

Paty Jager said...

Kathy, That sounds like my husband! Practical gifts on how to make our chores easier,

Terri Reed said...

Paty, I love the sunflower gesture. Did he kill the snake or was it long gone? Shudder. I've come face to face with a rattler before and my only thought was Eeeek and run but I didn't. I stayed put because that was what I was told to do if I ever encountered one. Then my dad arrived and shot the thing.

Karen Duvall said...

My husband is always the one to remember our anniversary and celebrate the small things in life. He's far more thoughtful than I. :)

The most romantic gesture I've ever heard was from a co-worker of mine years back who told me he painted his pregnant wife's toenails for her because she couldn't see or reach or feet. The memory of that precious sentiment has stayed with me for years.

I also think it's pretty darn romantic for a guy to make a special trip to buy his wife tampons. Guys are so squeamish about all that female stuff that to put his feelings aside for the woman he loves is an impressive gesture, IMO. As someone else said, it's those little unexpected and possibly uncharacteristic actions that say so very much.

Great blog post, Paty! :)

Paty Jager said...

Hi Terri,

No, the rattle snake got away that day. Thanks for stopping in.

Hey Karen!

I agree, it's the little gestures and not the big ones that matter. We had new year's day dinner with two couples in their 80's. One gentleman gave his wife 10 $50 bills for her birthday and one gave his wife a dozen roses. The one who gave his wife the roses was the one who won over the hearts of the women at the dinner!

Judith Ashley said...

Paty, What a great post to start off Romancing The Genre's month of Genre-ista Tips and Ideas for Romance. This might be my favorite topic! Read my post Friday to learn about the gesture made 48 years that still warms my heart.

Anonymous said...

I love your posts, Patti. I think buying a hay bailer IS a romantic gester, particularly because it recognizes the need to ease your workload. :)

My husband has never been a spontaneous gift giver. He grew up in a family that always asked what you wanted and then gave you that (within reason of course). I grew up in a family that was poor and we were taught early to never ask for anything.

Over the past three years my husband has become "the complimenter" and for me this is the greatest gift ever. He compliments my looks, my work, my intelligence, my caring, and even my writing. It's not a dailly thing, but it is several times a week and always sincere. He never used to do this, but now he does without prompt and with true meaningfulness. I can tell you that it means more to me than diamonds, roses, or other traditional gift.

Paty Jager said...

Judith, I'll get over and read your post when it's up.

Maggie, I agree. It's just having your hubby say something out of the blue can keep you walking on air. My husband after 33 years of marriage, a few months ago, when we were joking and playing around got sober and said, "I love your laugh." In all the years we'd been together he'd never said that. I was floating for weeks and still get a thrill when I think about his comment. It is the little things that mean the most.