Truthfully, I can’t imagine changing anything in my life, even the dreadful experiences of losing a job, or my sister, favorite aunt, and dad, and friends. Strange as it seems, and despite my longing to have all those people back in my life, the things, good or bad, have shaped who I am.
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Plant
given to me by the Maine Romance Writers in honor of my sister.
They bloom
every year right around her birthday
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Would I take back the temper tantrum, when I was fourteen,
(mind you, old enough to know better,) when I refused to go to the school my
parents wanted me too? No. Sure, I regret being a PIA to my parents. And,
thankfully, I did not win that battle. I just celebrated my 50th
high school reunion.
Looking back, the best years of my life.
My best friends (male and female) to this day are from that school, including those who I lost along the way. They were sorely missed, but their influence in my life was ever present. We had an incredible reunion, not only in recalling old memories, but many discussions on how growing up in the 60s and attending a Quaker school influenced every one of our lives. And all the more meaningful, for me, was how much more I appreciated the experience and lessons taught from the long-ago temper tantrum.
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| YAY for long-time, great friends |
Yes, I still talk
to my deceased family and friends, and wish they could answer me back, offer me
their wisdom, delight me with their humor, and accompany me on new adventures.
In truth, they are still there, in my heart and my mind.
But the fact is, if I changed any one thing, my life would be different and I would have missed out on something. The old adage, when one door closes, another opens. Each life experience led me to the next.
The one thing I do wish I could change are all the wasted moments.
The moments I was too tired to write while working
full-time, and keep up on all the constant changes in social media and
marketing. The missed communication with friends who are no longer here. Those are my regrets. The moments where it was easier to veg on the couch in front of a
Hallmark movie. Even though the movies have inspired my writing.
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Anyone
remember high school Christmas dances?
This love story is about the chaperones.
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And right now, on Hallmark, it is Christmas in July, 24 hours a day.
Which is perfect timing for revising my holiday romance, which has all things
Thanksgiving and Christmas at a Vermont inn, including a refurbished sleigh.
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| My hero refurbishes an old sleigh as a surprise for the heroine. |
Okay, total disclosure, I do watch those movies over and
over and over. But I also take notes, study how they construct the plot, the
character arcs, details on setting, and what tropes they use. I AM working and
learning. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
Having said all that, the wasted time of not keeping up on constant change, is now resulting in my taking more and more time out of my writing to catch up. And, hate to admit, but the “old” brain takes a lot longer to process the constant barrage of new information and updated techniques.
Still, I am who I am, because of the progression of my life experiences.
So moving forward, I’ll try to waste less time, take more opportunities to learn and experience, and live the rest of my life to the fullest (okay, I’ll still watch Hallmark and devour romances, because in my profession neither are a waste of time 😊 and they make me SUPER HAPPY.)
~ cottages to cabins ~ keep the home fires
burning ~
Delsora
Lowe writes small town sweet romances and contemporary westerns from the
mountains of Colorado to the shores of Maine. Author of the Starlight Grille series, Serenity Harbor
Maine novellas, and the Cowboys of
Mineral Springs series, Lowe has also authored short romances for Woman’s World magazine.
A first meet, royalty and the nanny romance
between a self-exiled prince with a royal chip on his shoulders and the local
rancher's daughter who rails against any man who tries to tell her what to do.
When she tries to tell the prince how to raise his son, tempers flare and
sparks fly.
Amazon E-book link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07PZD3FNC/ref=sr_1_2? rid=32PO3EI3KDLQI&keywords=delsora+lowe&qid=1553611414&s=digital-text&sprefix=dels%2Cdigital-text%2C196&sr=1-2-catcorr Amazon Print Book Link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1091276862?ref_=pe_3052080_397514860
Books2Read link, includes Barnes and Noble and iBooks: books2read.com/u/b6xzr6
Social Media Links:
Author website: www.delsoralowe.com
Author FaceBook page: fb.me/delsoraloweauthor
Amazon Author page: https://www.amazon.com/Delsora-Lowe/e/B01M61OM39/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0
Books2Read Author page: https://www.books2read.com/ap/8GWm98/Delsora-Lowe
BookBub Author Page: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/delsora-lowe-93c6987f-129d-483d-9f5a-abe603876518
Goodreads Author Page: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/16045986.Delsora_Lowe
Author FaceBook page: fb.me/delsoraloweauthor
Amazon Author page: https://www.amazon.com/Delsora-Lowe/e/B01M61OM39/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0
Books2Read Author page: https://www.books2read.com/ap/8GWm98/Delsora-Lowe
BookBub Author Page: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/delsora-lowe-93c6987f-129d-483d-9f5a-abe603876518
Goodreads Author Page: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/16045986.Delsora_Lowe
Clip Art Links
Classmates – crayons - https://www.dreamstime.com/stock-photos-group-photo-image740763
Christmas Sleigh - http://clipart-library.com/christmas-sleigh-pictures.html
Snarky happy face - http://cliparting.com/free-smiley-face-clip-art-1465/
Flying time – man and clock - https://www.iclipart.com/search.php?keys=cliches&tl=clipart
13 comments:
I agree, Delsora. Sure I regret a few of my actions and decisions, but if I changed that one thing, then the next FABULOUS thing might not have happened.
Excellent post. It's made me think about regrets and decisions too, but I agree, what we've done in the past has made us who we are.
Totally agree with your premise. Funny I also had a major melt-down, temper tantrum when I was about 14 about where I went to high school. I'd started my freshman year at the high school my elementary school fed into so All of My Friends were going there. Then my day was transferred from Portland to Corvallis. I cried, I begged, I pleaded, I cajoled and made their lives and everyone else's miserably (Misery certainly loves company). I even talked to the family of friends asking if I might live with them I was so desperate to remain with familiar friends in high school. I don't have the connections you forged in your new high school but the move certainly changed the trajectory of my life in many many ways.
I too had a melt down when my Dad had a chance to transfer to Pan American Airline's Japan station. Now I regret that because what an awesome experience it would have been. I don't know if my melt down was the only reason Dad didn't choose to go, but at the time I know he said it played a part in his decision. Highschoolers hate change! That was freshman year for me.
Then when I was entering my Senior year, my Dad transferred to Guam, and I was devastated!!! But the good that came out of that move, is I had no friends at first so I applied myself to my school work and ended up with all 'A's and 'B's. I learned about prejudices first hand, as I was a minority at the school. By spring I did have friends and was dating the senior class president. So all good in the end.
I read your book "Come Dance with Me" , loved it!!!
Judith - I guess that is a truly difficult age for teens and parents. I was lucky to have a wonderful experience. Before I had been in 5 schools in 6 years and it was hard to make friends. Or more accurately, to make friends you would keep up with afterwards. The amazing thing about my reunion was learning that so many of my classmates with parents who worked for the government saw their high school years as thee best, for the same reason. They had continuously changed schools. Probably one reason we ended up being such a close class.
Diana - you too!?! Moving your senior year must have been so hard. But kids are resilient and we learn from the changes, even though we HATE them :-)
Thanks so much for your compliment about Come Dance With Me - that is one book that has a lot of "me" in it, in that I channeled some of my high school experiences, but not as a teen, as an adult looking back. Add in my love for jazz, blues, and Motown (after spending my teen years in Washington, D.C.)… a hero was born :-)
Luanna and Susan - I added a comment but it never came through - just found it, hung up in cyberspace. Or rather Blogger not accepting it yet. See below
Luanna and Susan - thanks for dropping by. I could spend a lifetime going over regrets, for sure. But moving forward, learning lessons, and celebrating the good and the not so great are so important in the growth process. That old adage - you should never stop learning :-)
Thanks for this post, Delsora. We're the sum total of our missteps and our brilliant actions. I wish I had a better mechanism to remind me of that when I'm bemoaning my mistakes. : (
Anna - I agree. I am a great one for self-guilt. Thanks for stopping by and saying hello :-)
Wow! You're so right, Deb. You can't change one thing without changing something else. But every once in a while, I think "what if". Still, I'm happy with the choices I'v made in life.
And LOL! on the movies ... I thought I was the only one who did that kind of research. *snerk
Nina - I have to have an excuse for watching marathon movies :-) But seriously, I started making notes back when I was home recovering from surgery and watching wall-to-wall Hallmark movies, noticing patterns, etc. Now I say to myself - okay - here comes the Big Black Moment when all is lost and these two will NEVER get together. But that's the glory of romances. You KNOW in the end, there will be a happily-eve-after. And that concept makes me smile.
Thanks for stopping in to say hello!
Enjoyed your post, Delsora. I love watching anddeconstructing romantic movies, too.
Sarah, I am so sorry - I left a message for you a few days ago and it did not go through. Now I watch the same movie over and over and notice different things each time. It really does help. Plus, I tis interesting to see the difference between screenwriting and writing a novel.
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