Hi, I’m Judith Ashley, author of The Sacred Women’s Circle series, soul nourishing romantic women’s fiction with light paranormal elements. My stories show you what life could be like if you had a place like The Circle where you are unconditionally accepted, supported and loved. And where, with this support, you make choices to overcome the darkest nights and choose love and light.
So what.
Aanndd?
Your point is?
Does it really matter?
Or Will it matter in an hour, a day, a week, a month, a year, etc.?
I’ve heard these words or others with a
similar message for decades and I’ve pretty much ignored them…or…perhaps just
didn’t understand their importance.
You see, I’m a recovering independent high
achiever. Why? As the decades have passed, I’m physically no longer able to do
everything I did 20, 30 or 50 years ago. While it isn’t a surprise really, it
is causing problems.
I gladly gave up climbing ladders to clean
gutters. That one was easy.
What’s difficult is remembering (and no it
isn’t about actual memory), that I cannot/should not lift that pot of plants.
Why, I moved it out on the porch for the summer and then back in the house for
the winter with no problems.
I used to is not my favorite
refrain. I’m not in love with the word mindful
as in being mindful of my limitations. And that’s another word that is more
frequently used whether out loud or just in my ruminating mind.
The truth is in 2022 I did not meet many,
if any, of my goals.
Aanndd?
Does it really matter?
My point is the best advice I can give
myself in 2023 is Be Kind To Myself.
After, from my point of view, a fairly disastrous year, the sun still rises in
the east and sets in the west, winter is followed by spring then summer and
then fall. The earth still revolves on its axis and around the sun.
And unless I tell you what I screwed up,
didn’t accomplish, or just missed the mark, you won’t know and if you know me
well, I doubt that you care that I’m not as independent nor as high an
achiever as I once was.
Such is life.
I’m sailing in uncharted waters. I can
choose to stress out about it or I can seek the adventure awaiting me over the
next wave.
You can find all of my
books at your favorite e-book vendor. Be sure to ask your local library if
you’d prefer to read my books through that resource.
Learn more about Judith's The Sacred Women’s
Circle series at JudithAshleyRomance.com
Check out Judith’s Windtree Press author page.
You can also find Judith
on FB!
© 2023 Judith Ashley
14 comments:
Judith,
I am on the same wave length as you. I can not do all that I once could. Taking down the tree ornaments for instance gave me a sore shoulder for two days.
I like your saying "be mindful of my limitations" . That I will do as we begin 2023.
Good post!
JUdith, It is shocking to us high achievers to realize that we can't do as much as we once could. I'm a few years behind you and I am slowly seeing the things where I have my limits. The first is I can't fit everything I need to do into one day. My brain isn't running as fast as it once did. I think that is the hardest. You are doing a great job with what you do accomplish. Take it slow and be mindful.
Thanks for commenting, Diana. Pain is the most effective reminder of "my limitations"...but will I remember that a year from now when it comes to decorating for the holidays? Hope springs eternal...and sometimes we do remember it all and the pain is worth whatever it is we did.
Paty, I believe one thing we high achievers end up doing is being out of balance in that we focus on those concrete achievements (words written, books published, chores accomplished) and the softer achievements (savoring with family and friends, sitting and enjoying a sunrise/sunset through the entire process) gets short shrift. I've found I need to be more mindful of those softer achievements because I use what energy I have on the concrete ones.
Good point, Judith. May you be able to do the things that really speak to you in 2023. The rest. as you say, doesn't really matter.
Lynn
It is obvious wisdom comes with age and I totally understand. We all are very hard on ourselves, especially overachievers but I think life at a certain age ( and our bodies) force us to slow down and being kind to oneself and pacing ourselves differently isn’t a bad thing.
Anna, I've certainly reached the age where my body is in charge of what I can and cannot do. It is a harder lesson for me to learn than I thought it would be - if I ever really did think about it. And being kind to oneself as we learn these life lessons is always a good thing. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your wisdom.
Lynn, thanks for reading my post and commenting. I have hope of doing those things that really matter to me...the list isn't as long as the one of things I think I should want or need to do.
I love this, Judith, and know it will be me in just a little while, if I am privileged enough to get there. Thank you for showing the way.💜
Yes, we have to learn our limits and actually pay attention. Doing that is the hard part. And each year we lose a bit more of our physical abilities.
Thanks for stopping by and commenting, Anonymous. May you easily "get there".
Barb, yes, the hard part is learning and paying attention to our limits Before we hurt ourselves! I find I'm at a high level of risk on my "good days" because of the "paying attention" piece. Not that I'm wanting "bad days"...it's just that I am more mindful and pay closer attention then.
"Be mindful of one's limitations" is very good advice. Thank you, Judith.
Sarah, it is good advice however I find it difficult to follow as I usually remember "one's limitation" when I've smashed up against it!
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