Showing posts with label Partners. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Partners. Show all posts

Monday, June 28, 2021

Spark and Fire

By Courtney Pierce


Sorry to break it to you, but men and women are very different in how they forge relationships, especially in print. I’ve nailed the female side of the equation, but I tend to need serious support when it comes to behavior driven by testosterone. It’s like pushing my chapters into the TSA x-ray machine and waiting to hear, “Bag check!” on the other side.

I require all of my male characters to be vetted by the real deal—a manly man. My husband is a prolific reader, a writer, a mountain man, a hunter, a lover, a protector, and happens to have a huge heart (not necessarily in that order). He's the man for the job. He calls B.S. on my prose, becauseI tend to feminize emotions. And that's not how real men think. I can't pretend to know what goes on in an alpha-man brain, so I take the suggested changes with open arms. After six books, criticism makes my work better.

The story magic of a compelling relationship isn’t made up out of thin air. We authors infuse a  a goodly amount of emotional truth into the prose, both about ourselves and the partners we’ve had in our lives. How else could we pull off the creation of a relationship that’s believable? If it's real within the author, then it's real to the reader.

My husband is protective of his family to the point of hanging a 12-guage shot gun at the front door. He's ready for the "what if," and he'd fight to the death should there be a serious threat. Otherwise, he's a pretty mellow guy. I don't completely understand it, but I certainly feel protected and loved as a result. 

First time writers make the huge mistake of creating relationships with endless pages of dialog, usually from the female perspective. Their characters pour their hearts out to each other with endless blabber about feelings. I, myself, made this mistake in one of many drafts of my first book Stitches. I ended up deleting most of it after a heart-to-heart with my editor. I started over.

Relationships are forged with nuance. A glance. A touch. A connection across a room full of people. The unspoken moments create partner magic.

In my next book, BIG SKY TALK, Aubrey Cenderon brings three layers of baggage to her introduction to Sheriff Russell Knowles: the death of her father, several years of being a single woman, and leaving behind a career to transition into retirement. Little does Aubrey know that her baggage will drive the direction of her future—with a little supernatural help.

The sheriff ignites the spark through his protectiveness of Aubrey. He wants her safe from an injured grizzly bear in the neighborhood. The conflict and connection begin with a threat.

Russell Knowles sets off Aubrey’s healing process the minute he meets her. But he has a case to solve and Aubrey has the key. Something isn’t right here—or maybe it’s something quite right and new. His focus in his official capacity wavers in Aubrey’s presence. There’s something about her that awakens his six sense for the unexplained. The threat is of another world. Russell knows it, and so does Aubrey. 

No two people of Boomer age create an intimate connection without a history. Past experiences drive reactions and future actions. It’s inevitable. Characters fight and conquer old demons in order to start fresh. They each learn something new about themselves and grow in the process.

The unexplainable becomes the catalyst for bringing lovers together. The magic of a spiritual connection becomes the driving force.  And that's the magic of a relationship: the belief that something higher fuses two people together.

Love can't be analyzed, studied, documented, or forensically pulled apart to prove it's real. But we know in our heart it is very real.  While you can't touch it, touch is a result. You can't see the pheromones of love chemistry, but our head swoons with them. Our chest tightens from the heart pound, like looking over a cliff at crashing waves . . . 

and deciding 
                     to take 
                                a leap 
                                            of faith.

Co
urtney Pierce is a fiction writer living in Kalispell, Montana with her husband and stepdaughter. She writes for the baby boomer audience. She spent 28 years as an executive in the entertainment industry and used her time in a theater seat to create stories that are filled with heart, humor, and mystery. She studied craft and storytelling at the Attic Institute and has completed the Hawthorne Fellows Program for writing and publishing. Active in the writing community, Courtney is a board member of the Northwest Independent Writers Association and on the Advisory Council of the Independent Publishing Resource Center. She is a member of Willamette Writers, Pacific Northwest Writers Association, and Authors of the Flathead. The Executrix received the Library Journal Self-E recommendation seal.

Print and E-books are available through most major online retailers, including Amazon.com.
Check out all of Courtney's books: 


New York Times best-selling author Karen Karbo says, "Courtney Pierce spins a madcap tale of family grudges, sisterly love, unexpected romance, mysterious mobsters and dog love. Reading Indigo Lake is like drinking champagne with a chaser of Mountain Dew. Pure Delight."

Coming in 2022!


When Aubrey Cenderon moves to Montana after the death of her father, the peace and quiet of Big Sky Country becomes complicated with a knock on the door from the sheriff. An injured grizzly bear is on the loose and it must be eliminated before it kills again. The sheriff's insistence that she buy a gun for protection will present Aubrey with some serious soul-searching, because the grizzly-on-the-run is hunting her too . . . for a different reason.




Tuesday, June 15, 2021

Building Character Partnerships Through Conflict and Resolution … Delsora Lowe

There are so many things that must happen to have a good relationship or partnership. And there are so many things that can derail that same relationship or partnership. Now I don’t begin to claim to know what all those things are or how to solve them in real life. But I do know that what I throw at my characters are the challenges that come from a new or growing or steady and reliable relationship, depending on the story line.

In real life we want to avoid struggles and solve each one as it pops up. As writers, we want to throw challenges and struggles in the path of our characters to force them to deal with conflict by resolving them each step of the way. By dealing with the not so pleasant aspects of life and relationships, our characters learn to work with each other, compromise, and grow. The journey is both full of stumbling blocks and emotional. And if we write romance, the goal is to make sure the heroes and heroines acquire the tools to navigate stumbling blocks, and learn and grow enough to end up HAPPIY-EVER-AFTER with each other.

As if it were that easy.

Truthfully, our goal as writers of romance is to make the characters struggle, learn, and resolve.

One way to make your characters squirm is through conversation. There is research that indicates men and women converse in different ways with different expectations on how the conversation will go.

In an article entitled “‘Manspeak’ and ‘Womanspeak’: Interpretation Needed” in the Philadelphia Inquirer on June 10, 2020, the author says:

Our ponderous query:
Are men and women constitutionally incapable of speaking the same
language?
There is "manspeak," an abbreviated system of monosyllabic responses and an occasional sentence.
And then there is "womanspeak," which undulates and flows with meaning and nuance. Words come easily and are plentiful. Compound sentences and multiple paragraphs are common.
So what happens when you plunk down two different language speakers in one household?
Confusion. Irritation. Frustration. And, of course, communication gaps.” 

Having one character interpret the other’s intent, and not get it right, sets both up for conflict in
their relationship. Having the two learn to converse—talk things out, negotiate their different wants and needs—leads to growth for each and eventually a happy resolution.

What we want to see is the characters learning more about each other, struggling along the way, and then learning to compromise and understand. If a reader doesn’t experience the growth, and the conflict that should precipitate growth between the characters that lead to a happy resolution—the prerequisite happily-ever-after in a romance—then they will leave the story behind less satisfied.

As both writers and readers of romance, our goal is to root for the characters to find that happy resolution. But if authors don’t add roadblocks, whether internal angst of some sort, or external forces that cause strife that lead the reader to believe “oh, no, what if these two don’t make it?,” then we don’t give the reader an emotional ride.

June is considered one of the big months for weddings—considered the ultimate in pursuing and eventually achieving a happily-ever-after. But we all know the angst and conflict that can arise in preparing a wedding and getting to the alter. And that emotional struggle continues in every step a couple takes throughout their relationship.

The ups and downs should make couples stronger together and individually, as they navigate the years. That is what romance writers strive for when writing about relationships—the emotional ups and downs that lead to that all important happily-ever-after or happily-for-now.

Here’s to effective communication and happy resolutions!

 The Love Left Behind 
a wedding novella

Amazon
  
https://www.amazon.com/Love-Left-Behind-Hartford-Estate-ebook/dp/B08L5N5DS9/

Books2Read   books2read.com/u/mglVqK

~ cottages to cabins ~ keep the home fires burning ~

Delsora Lowe writes small town sweet and spicy romances and contemporary westerns from the mountains of Colorado to the shores of Maine.

Author of the Starlight Grille series, Serenity Harbor Maine novellas, and the Cowboys of Mineral Springs series, Lowe has also authored short romances for Woman’s World magazine. Her new novella, The Love Left Behind, will release in late fall, 2020.

Social Media Links:  

Author website: www.delsoralowe.com
Facebook Author page:
https://www.facebook.com/delsoraloweauthor/community/
Amazon Author page:
https://www.amazon.com/Delsora-Lowe/e/B01M61OM39/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0
Books2Read Author page:
https://www.books2read.com/ap/8GWm98/Delsora-Lowe
BookBub Author Page: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/delsora-lowe-93c6987f-129d-483d-9f5a-abe603876518
Goodreads Author Page:
https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/16045986.Delsora_Lowe
Instagram: #delsoralowe / https://www.instagram.com/delsoralowe/

Clip Art: 
Free Man And Woman Clipart, Download Free Man And Woman Clipart png images, Free ClipArts on Clipart Library (clipart-library.com) 
Free Conversation Cliparts, Download Free Conversation Cliparts png images, Free ClipArts on Clipart Library (clipart-library.com)

Article reference:
‘Manspeak’ and ‘womanspeak’: Interpreter needed (inquirer.com)

 

Monday, June 14, 2021

It's June and Love is in the air!

 






By: Marcia King-Gamble

www.lovemarcia.com

With June busting out all over, and long overdue weddings happening, the question arises what is a relationship? Or rather what is a good relationship?

I have often pondered what gives when I see couples, walking several steps ahead of each other, or texting while dining, and not conversing,

Statistics show that 50% of marriages end in divorce. There’s speculation that number is even higher since the stats do not factor in those that are separated.  So why do partnerships crumble? In my humble opinion, it breaks down to three things.

Not viewing a partner as a friend

Entering the union for the wrong reasons

Having expectations that no mortal could possibly fulfill.

Let’s look at my thoughts in more detail.

A partner should be your best friend, someone you communicate with well, in and out of the bedroom. Lack of communication, or failure to communicate, is the number one reason, people get divorced.

Did you get pulled into a relationship for the wrong reasons? I always think of the adage, marry for money, spend the rest of your life earning it. So true, and in so many ways. As they say, nothing in life is free.  If you’re in it, because you think you need to have someone on your arm, anyone, that’s a sure recipe for disaster and possibly boredom.

It’s not the lack of finances that causes divorce/break ups, but lack of compatibility in the financial arena. If he’s a spender and you’re not, watch out for trouble.

Codependency? Yet another reason not to be in a relationship. Not to mention it’s unhealthy.  Having your own interests makes you a more fascinating person. As one article I read said, don’t become “couple dumb.”  Be your own individual. Show yourself.  Don’t lose yourself in the relationship.

Also, make sure you have some interests in common, and goals that align.  Opposites might attract, but will you be compatible long term?

What about expectations… are yours way over the top? Are they realistic? Many think partnerships mean being joined at the hip. Not so. Are you looking to be taken care of financially?  Are you expecting that knight/ princess to sweep you off your feet? Are you looking to be saved from yourself? Reality check.

What about traditional roles?  Are those expected of you. Is one expected to cook, while the other takes out the garbage? These are all things that need to be ironed out before taking the leap into coupledom, or you’re destined to be frustrated. Frustration can usually lead to disappointment.




Ok, so now that I’ve given you my thoughts, ask yourself why you’re thinking of getting married or moving in? What prompted you to accept the proposal or the invitation to cohabitate?  Did you say “yes” because this is your person AKA your best friend, or are you marrying because your biological clock is ticking, and your partner ticks a few boxes? Did you say “Yes,” because this person appears to be a good provider? Is this someone you’d never choose as a friend. If the answers to both are “yes,” then may I suggest you lose this person quickly before you lose yourself.

 I know, so many questions, so many ways to answer, so many ifs. So many reasons to be in a relationship or bow out.

Whatever you decide, choose wisely. The dew falls off the rose quickly, but the thorns tend to stay on. While love might have something to do with it, decisions should be made with both your head and heart.

 Happy June!

Coming in October 2021



About Marcia King-Gamble

Romance writer, Marcia King-Gamble originally hails from a sunny Caribbean Island where the sky and ocean are the same mesmerizing shade of blue. This former travel industry executive has spent most of life in the United States. A National Bestselling author, Marcia has penned over 34 books and 8 novellas. She has contributed to Michael Fiore’s DigitalRomanceInc and served as a moderator on the now defunct eHarmony advice boards.  Having witnessed the bad, the ugly, and the not so good in relationships, she still prefers to write about happily ever after. Caring for her animal family keeps her grounded and sane.

Visit Marcia at www.lovemarcia.com or “friend” her on Facebook: http://bit.ly/1MlnrIS

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