Showing posts with label insecurities. Show all posts
Showing posts with label insecurities. Show all posts

Monday, February 25, 2019

Tugging Heartstrings


By Courtney Pierce

I can tell when an author has personal experience with the pain and conflict they write about. I dive into a book—my own or someone else’s—with a load of cargo that sticks and prickles in my skin like emotional Velcro. Experiences with love, loss, betrayal, divorce, and death give us fuel to connect with like-minded characters. That’s why I pump my protagonists full of emotions based on my own experiences. And I have an animal (usually a dog or cat) in the mix to act as the lightning rod of sensitivity.


Animals react with all their senses. They perk their ears to listen, sniff the air for trouble, hood their eyes in anger, and make all kinds of noises as if they’re having a conversation. The droop of a dog’s tail in disappointment squeezes my heart. A vigorous wag of loyalty makes me smile. These gestures only magnify the sentiment at the center of a story.

What really draws me like a magnet is the moment when a character falls in love, especially if the hook-up is unexpected. It can be a world-rocker if the character has been previously hurt to their core. The world opens with the ability to trust after having been betrayed. Promises of “I’ll never ever do that to you” and “Shhh . . . just hold me” hint that anything’s possible.

In turn, when a character unexpectedly loses the love of their life through no fault of their own, I can be reduced to tears. My mind races to all the words that will never be said. Their hopes and dreams won’t be fulfilled. The pain of ripped separation is sometimes more than I can bear. .. . but I keep reading.


Heartstrings get plucked by the simplest of things—a glance, a snub, an unfair snark. Insecurities ignite a whole host of emotions. Dialogue can be only a word or two to start a rapid heartbeat. That moment comes exactly at the 50% mark in my latest book Indigo Legacy. When my character, widow Olivia Novack, spills her insecurities to Woody, her fiancĂ©, in a chapter titled The Conversation, the history of her former 32-year marriage comes out. This glimpse of dialogue took an inordinate amount of time to get the exchange just right. I didn’t have to dig too deep within myself to strike oil.

Here’s an excerpt:

“Adam was the only man I’d ever been with, besides you,” Olivia said.

“Seriously?” Woody said.

She threw him a sideways glance. “Okay, let’s qualify that. A real relationship, not relations I had before Adam. College doesn’t count.”

Woody nodded. “An important technicality. Keep going. Nothing you’ve said, so far, spooks me.”

“I made a terrible, unforgivable mistake with Adam. The worst kind.”

“Did you have an affair?”

“God no. Worse.”

“What then?”

The question hovered for a few seconds as Olivia’s chest tightened. “I took him for granted. Assumed he’d always be there. We became a pair of old shoes, like the ones you keep around because they were your favorites once. It had become solid-gold boredom. After Adam died, I regretted every wasted day that I didn’t touch him, didn’t say that I loved him, or didn’t whisper a sexy surprise in his ear.” She turned and met the endless blue in Woody’s eyes. They were glass. “He didn’t do any of those things for me, either. I was slowly starving to death, and I didn’t know why. I would’ve thanked the stars if he’d ever come up behind me and nuzzled my neck for no reason, turned off the stove and planted a kiss on me, held me just because, or left me a note as a reminder that he loved me. But he didn’t. I was so lonely in his company, and anything I tried ended up making me more frustrated. You won’t waste any days, will you?”

“No, Liv, I won’t. I’m so sorry.”

“You asked for full disclosure, so I’m giving it to you. Little gestures mean everything to keep a long-standing marriage from disintegrating. I love it when your eyes tell me a secret from across a room, one only we know between us. My emotional clock resets when you grab my hand and say, ‘Let’s go.’ The cop and perp stuff we played in New York was amazing. Almost like sex . . . almost.” She dabbed the outer corners of her eyes. “I love you whether you do that stuff or not.” She glanced at him. “But it would be better if we both promised to make the investment.”

Woody pulled her forward to a hungry kiss. He ate her up like in a pie-eating contest, and then pulled away. “I take it back,” he said. “You are a romantic, and you’re doing a lousy job of trying to talk me out of marriage.”

She took his cue to lighten the mood. Deep-dish conversation required small spoons. “Then here’s a request for you after we’re married . . . ”

Woody spread his hands. “Give me all you’ve got.”

“No show-off burping. Guys do that.” Olivia tried, without success, to not smirk. “And sports on TV can’t be an all-day affair.”

From the glint in his eyes, the baton had been passed. “We have to watch the Olympics, Liv—nonnegotiable—summer and winter. I promise to burp super quietly only every two years.

“Does that mean they’re loud the rest of the time?”

“Not around you.”

I love writing dialogue, the Yin and Yang unveils personal conflict and scrapiness. It's what characters say to each other - or to themselves - that touches my heart. And if I squeeze a balm of humor over the scene, it will all be okay. A huge revelation is delivered at the end of the above scene that sends the second half of the book into high gear. No spoilers.

And, yes, Olivia Novack gets her second chance at love, along with all those little gestures of affection she dreamed about . . . but I make her endure quite a bit of pain for the reward.


Courtney Pierce is a fiction writer living in Milwaukie, Oregon, with her husband. stepdaughter, and their brainiac cat, Princeton. Courtney writes for the baby boomer audience. By day, she is an executive in the entertainment industry and uses her time in a theater seat to create stories that are filled with heart, humor and mystery. She has studied craft and storytelling at the Attic Institute and has completed the Hawthorne Fellows Program for writing and publishing. Active in the writing community, Courtney is a board member of the Northwest Independent Writers Association and on the Advisory Council of the Independent Publishing Resource Center. She is a member of Willamette Writers, Pacific Northwest Writers Association, and She Writes. The Executrix received the Library Journal Self-E recommendation seal.

Audiobook now Available!
Check out all of Courtney's books: 
windtreepress.com 

Print and E-books are available through most major online retailers, including Amazon.com.

Available Now!
Book 3 of the
Dushane Sisters
Trilogy
The Dushane Sisters Trilogy concludes with Indigo Legacy, available now. There's love in the air for Olivia and Woody, but will family intrigue get in the way? Ride along for the wild trip that starts in a New York auction house and peaks in a mansion on Boston's Beacon Hill. 

The Dushane sisters finally get to the truth about their mother.


New York Times best-selling author Karen Karbo says, "Courtney Pierce spins a madcap tale of family grudges, sisterly love, unexpected romance, mysterious mobsters and dog love. Reading Indigo Lake is like drinking champagne with a chaser of Mountain Dew. Pure Delight."